Just thought I'd chime in here again, especially since I find some of the recent discussion pretty interesting, and definitely relate... By that I mean the curse aspect of a lot of the files like CFG, or the idea of forcing something onto myself or someone... I would definitely relate to more files being made that are more positive in nature - positive affirmations about the attractiveness of the male body and men in general, the appeal and quality of the sexual experiences that can be had, encouragement to expand ones experiences and options for sexual satisfaction, etc. I definitely feel like I relate more to those ideas and thoughts in the files when they're present and come through, and don't find the more degrading or humiliating thoughts to be nearly as appealing. So while I may be listening to CFG or Curse stroke gay or other files, I find myself attempting to interpret or "hear" them in a positive way as something I should experience and be open to for the pleasure of it, rather than something I deserve in a degrading way. I certainly recognize that there are those that find the dominating or degrading aspect appealing, but there are those of us out there that relate more to a positive reinforcement kind of experience too.
With that said, I still have yet to find the right person to fully initiate myself into the lifestyle, but the interest remains strong - and I think I can say is still progressing. I know I related the strong reaction I had to a guy a while back when I truly felt real, strong arousal for the first time in a way I never had before to the point of imagining him naked and getting hard while talking to him. I can now say that's no longer a one off experience... I can't say it happens with many guys, and while isolated in nature there have been a few other instances since then that have happened with other guys. I'm really curious if this will continue to become a more frequent occurrence, and how rapidly it may progress - and definitely don't mind if it does! After all I can't help but think that will lead to finally having my first real experience one of these days.
