Just a small strange update.
I've stopped listening to CFT for a while now and thought things had reset to normal and my little experiment was over. However, I've been increasingly having stronger and stronger transgender feelings and its been quite confusing and stressful. I've tried to to them down though and say its just a fetish.
This has finally came to a head last night, as I was researching hormones and feminisation, and was just curious so I began looking into hormones and doses and what things like that cost. I went through and kept clicking and wound up with a cart full of 2 months of estrogen and I kept saying to myself "whats the next step like?" And kind of before I knew it and without thinking too much I had paid and now it is being sent to me

.
I'm not sure what to do know and I really hope my gf doesn't get to the package before I do because idk how to explain something so stupid. Im torn between getting my hands on them and throwing them right in the garbage, or trying them for a couple weeks to see how I feel.
long story short, this is a pine i never intended on crossing and i cant believe what im doing. Even though its stupid and wreckless, im also so confused and excoted about what im doing. I'm done with the file but I'm not so sure its done with me