by werepuppy » July 18th, 2009, 3:12 pm
And my email for what happened today. I'd rather write everything up nicely if anybody's nterested but I took so long to do this, I'm too tired and I can't stop shaking right now, I don't feel so good. So here's the email I sent Wulf again.
What happened today
This morning was nice. Waking up in bed, feeling all comfortable and innocent. Its saturday, I don't need to work, and don't need to do anything really. Well, until I took the pendant off and started coming up with crazy plans. See, one of my first thoughts was I wonder if Jenny listned to that CD yet. Did I tell you I gave her a copy yesterday? I should of done. I was thinking maybe I should email her. Something like "You will tell me if you listened to the CD", half jokey, to start off with. Make it seem like fun.
Then when I got up, I flicked on the laptop to see if she's written me. You're online, and we chat for a bit. I'm being a very giggly little girl, doing silly things like making a big jam smiley in my porridge. Its great being able to be so excited and proud of such little things. Wulf told me to take off my pendant while I ate, which is probably good, because I seem to spill things a lot when I'm being little. But just for a few minutes, I was still kinda comfortable, and I put it back on staight away. Soon after breakfast, I was still sitting at the kitchen table, and you made me wee. It was embarrassing, humiliating, all the usual things. But now it seems a bit different, its like I'm really a little girl, so it doesn't matter any more. Best of both worlds, I guess, the thrill of misbehaving without any guilt.
After that I went off shopping. The outfit took a bit of deciding on, but I eventually settled for carrying on with my pyjamas and see if anybody notices. I tied a scarf thing around my waist, and added some orange ears (on a headband) and tail (4', foam rubber core, clip on). I wondered if anybody would notice this wasn't real clothes ... I doubt it, its rough silk fabric and it kind of matches my pink handbag. I thought I should try and get some nappies so I'm not in so much trouble whenever somebody emails me and makes me wee on myself. But in the end I was too embarrassed to look. The pharmacy in Keele has a big selection of absorbent pants but I wasn't sure what's best out of all those types, and I don't want to ask when there's other people around, and there always is. I wondered a bit about something more in theme with the little-kid dresses. I'm pretty small, wondering if big size baby nappies might actually be big enough. I'm definately too embarrassed to ask about that. So I did the rest of the grocery shopping and went home. Got myself a dummy, though :) If being little is so much fun, I might as well find out just how young I can enjoy being. Had a thought while I was out, though; yesterday I think we agreed not to play any more because somebody I like wasn't ready to deal with my whole "not hoping for another try" thing. She'd sent me an email that said I'd be obsessed with her among other things, when it got rejected (by Angel, before it got to me) she'd been a bit upset I think.
When I got home, I asked Angel to tell me what's in that email. And I thought about it, and realised there's nothing really bad there, just stuff I'm not reay to deal with. But she gave me so much fun, the pendant and the being little and everything. And more than anything else, she never tried to make me feel helpless or weak. That can be excitig, but I think for the person who made me feel comfortable and safe and protected, I might actually not mind knowing that what I feel now will continue. But to just never have rad an entire email, most of it designed to make me happy, just isn't fair. I asked Angel to send it to me, let it through anyway. He said my in-head safeties would throw it out, so I asked him to get it past those. It was half an hour later the email got here at last, it'd taken like a whole day, and 10 minutes later I didn't remember any of what was in it. Mybe that sounds like a dramatic gesture, trying to show I'm serious or something. But I really didn't think of it like that. I just thought I wanted to read all she'd written for me, I owed her that much at least, even if she never knows. I'm still watching Otogi Jushi Akazukin while I make some lunch. I put together a massive salad bowl, and put out a variety of salami, chorizo, tongue, spam, fried spam, couple of boiled eggs left from a midnight snack, pickles, and all sorts. But every time I sit down to eat, I remember something else that kind of buffet needs. You know how it is.
Then, just when I put the pickles down and buttered some bread, I had an idea. An idea to see if Jenn is listening to this CD, without being too risky she'll find out hat I'm into. I sent my first email slave email: "Come shopping with me after work. It'll be fun, you'll enjoy it. You won't think I'm weird because of what I want." I figure if it works, I can get her to help me buy the stuff I'm ashamed about. She's a real ladette, brash and direct, so if anyone asks anything they'll just assume its a practical joke. And if I tell her I need the nappies because somebody used my email slave to make me dress like a baby, she'll laugh like hell, but only take the piss like she would for somebody who got pissed and puked on their pants. I can take some ribbing if its just a joke. While I was sending that I got another email, but I can't remember what it says. All my fans know, so I don't need to I know I had to post it on the forum, but every time I go back to read it it just gets stronger and I still don't know. I went back to the kitchen, sat down, and noticed a flashing thing on my laptop. Somebody sent me a message. I wondered whether to just leave it, or say "I'm on lunch, back soon". Of course if its somebody who had hypnosis over me, once I'd looked at that message I might not be able to go have lunch. But still, got to be polite. I went into the lounge, stopped for a moment to enjoy the feel of the thick carpet under my feet, pushing up around my toes. Its lovely, something I really miss at dad's house. Clicked on the messenger and its Her. Angel must of told her I read that email, and she wants to play again.
She talked about stroking my feet, and it turned me on so much. I don't know what She said but it felt like everything She typed, She was doing for real, and every touch was driving me wild, and then I was touching Her feet too and I was so horny I couldn't help myself, rubbing myself off through the silky fabric of my pyjamas and suddenly I had to ask permission to cum. She made me feel so good, but it was so humiliating, and I don't know if I want it or not. It seemed like it lasted forever, but it was all over too quick, and Jenn came round to help me shop. I don't know if she listened to the CD or not, but she said she did and she wasn't too shocked by me. I said somebody on the email slave had told me to dress up like a baby, and she thought it was kind of funny. She said that the XL size pull-ups will fit me, and then she got me a balloon that somebody was giving out to advertise something or other, I'm not sure really, I was already wearing my pendant ring by then, and just enjoyed being pulled round all the shops holding a balloon and looking at all the bright colours. Jenn put a ribbon in my hair and laughed at how cute I look as a baby, and then we went to the arcade and I ended up buying a load of frilly dresses and really cute clothes, I should have thought more about what I can afford but it was just like I was a real little kid, mummy mking all the decisions while I just tried things on and everything was a blur.
When I got back I started writing this email, but it already took me more than 4 hours, I haven't got a minute without somebody trying to talk to me or the council phoning about some problem with my taxes or something. Then somebody asked for photos, well, didn't ask but made me think she was going to. I said I didn't want to and She was like do I just want to be pushed, and I was getting scared. I didn't know what to write, bcause I knew if she just told me to send Her pictures I would, and if I did that then I wouldn't be talking to the person I thought I knew. I just panicked and pulled the plug. I know she probably wouldn't have made me, but she could so easily, and I'm scared. I should put Google back on and tak again, but I don't kno what I should say. I'm just too weak.
So ... day of ups and downs. I know there's more that happened that I should post, but I can't remember it now. I feel so shaken up.